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I am by no means the perfect mom or wife for that matter. I aspire to be. I would like to think I am not THE worst mother on the planet, but there are days when I certainly feel that way. Adulting has changed me in a way that I never thought possible. Growing up I was a fairly positive person, not necessarily outgoing but positive nonetheless. I was carefree, athletic, and most of the time fun to be around. All that has changed since becoming an adult. I have let life get to me. I have let it change me. I let the world determine my self-worth. I decided I do not want that for my girls so I’m going to change it! I want to raise confident young girls that know their self worth and their value.
So what are the keys to raising confident young girls and eventually young women? There are so many things that seem small but in fact have a lasting effect on girls.
- From early on in life, most little girls like to feel pretty and be told that they are. However, how you go about that is what matters. Do you tell your daughters, nieces, granddaughters, sisters that they are pretty when they are all dressed up? Or when they have on makeup? I do like most other parents do, but I also make it a point to tell them how beautiful they are when they are NOT all dressed up. I tell my girls they are the most beautiful when they wake up with sleepy eyes and some serious bed-head. ( I mean serious) Little girls should know and understand that makeup and fancy clothes are not what makes them pretty or beautiful. I believe that is of utmost importance when trying to raise confident young girls.
- Little girls feed off of the adults or teens around them. Having a positive self-body image is important, but especially so around the littles. Since giving birth to my two girls, I have been diagnosed with PCOS and getting the weight off has been a real struggle. I know that my girls can see that I am overweight and I am not as “skinny” as some of my friends. I do not talk about it much and I do NOT let them hear me talk about how unhappy I am with my weight and the way I look. When they ask, and of course they have, I tell them mommy is working on getting in shape and getting healthy. I never say “I want to be skinny” or “I’m too fat” because I don’t want them thinking those things about themselves. Even though I am overweight, I’m working hard to change that and my kids can see that as well.
- Do you watch what you say about others? They do. While watching tv or at the pool or out shopping, do you comment on the appearance of others? I have caught myself doing just that in front of my children and what it is teaching them is to judge other women and girls. If you only comment on how pretty the skinny girls or women are, what kind of message are you sending to your children? I do think skinny women are beautiful, but I also think muscly women are as well and bigger women are too. I just want my kids to understand that no matter the size or shape of a person, they are beautiful. God made each body differently and He doesn’t judge us based on that so why would we?
- Talk about what you like/love about your own body in front them! I love my hair and my eyes but I also love that I have strong legs for running and playing ball! Let them see that it’s okay to love yourself just as you are!
- Above all, make sure they know that you love them for who they are and how they look no matter how that may be. Bodies change so much as we grow and mature that there is no telling what they will look like when they are older. They just need to know that your love for them will not waver not matter what.
I am by no means telling you all anything that I wouldn’t expect of myself. I try to implement these things in my everyday life as well. I am not perfect and sometimes I mess up, but my kids know they are loved and I hope they love themselves for who they are!Raise up your daughters so that they love themselves and know they are perfect the way they are!Click To Tweet